Double en-suite in East Village w/ cat + teacher

My name is Milo and I am a two-year-old black-and-white shorthair. You'll find a picture of me below. I'm looking for a new Human/Humans to take the place of departing Human in my spacious flat in the East Village, Stratford. (Human Number 1, Nick, believes he owns the flat, and I let him continue to labour under this delusion.)

The Humans have taken pictures of the rooms, which they put below. The double room has its own bathroom and access to the large balcony (which I sometimes like to go onto for zoomy time).

The lounge and kitchen is my favourite place to be, with lots of sofa space to take up. (I am totally allowed onto the kitchen tops, and if Human Number 1 tells you otherwise then he is a filthy liar.)

Living with me comes with various expectations, including regular cuddles, and opening doors for me whenever I demand it. I may wish to not then walk through the open door. I am a fickle creature.

Meanwhile Human Number 1 seems like a decent sort. He keeps me fed and cleans out my poop. He seems to leave the house fairly often to spend time with other Humans and do something called a "pub quiz", which I assume is his regular source of income. (He also apparently goes out each day to stand in front of 30 smaller humans who write down things he says. I don't understand this.) I've also heard him talk about something called 'am-dram', which - to the best of my understanding - seems to be when he walks around pretending to be a different human in front of a whole group of humans who have paid to see him to this. Humans are a very unusual species.

There are also lots of "board games" in the house that the Humans like to get out so I can play with all the pieces. They shout at me when I do this... I don't understand why.

My favourite thing about Human Number 1 is that he likes to cook Human food, which he sometimes gives me as a treat, and I sometimes steal. Sundays in particular are Roast days. These are the best days.

Human Number 2 is leaving most of their furniture and will take offers on these. (I accept premium cat food, but the Humans may insist on taking Human money). If you get a new bed, I would appreciate you bringing one that has space underneath for me to hide when I've been naughty. There is in-built wardrobe space in the room where you can store your clothes to give me even more good hiding spots.

If two Humans want to share the room, then this would be £1400 Human pounds. I enjoyed having double the number of subjects in the room recently, so joint applicants are considered and encouraged. If you have any other questions, please reply to this ad and I will instruct Human Number 1 to give you any extra information you need.